


All I want for Christmas

by jackycleo



Category: James Bond (Craig movies), Skyfall (2012) - Fandom
Genre: 00Q - Freeform, Christmas, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-23
Updated: 2013-12-23
Packaged: 2018-01-05 18:42:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1097353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jackycleo/pseuds/jackycleo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For all the people who can't celebrate christmas the way they want to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	All I want for Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> James Bond, Q and the (asofterworld.com -)poem do not belong to me.
> 
> I wrote this in the middle of the night, I hope there aren't too many typos in there... :/

_All I want for Christmas is you_

When James sleepily turns around in their bed to face the clock, it's already 11 am.  
“Damn!”  
He sits up immediately. It's the 24.12. and there's still so much to get for tonight!  
Q barely moves next to him, so he just kisses his forehead quickly, telling him, he'll be back in about two hours.  
He doesn't want to leave his boyfriend alone for so long on Christmas but he knows Q wouldn't like to join him and help him do the shopping.

He should have made a list.  
There are dozens of people in the supermarket, everyone pushing, arguing, running around looking for the last gingerbread, chocolate stars and ingredients for the roasted duck. The queue before the checkout counter is the longest he had seen until today. Usually Q did the shopping but since James took a vacation, he was able to do it himself now.  
Chicken, duck, venison?  
It was their first Christmas together and they had never bothered to talk about how they used to celebrate it. Bond usually did with a lot of alcohol, a pretty woman and fair shag but this was definitely not what Q was looking for.  
James chose venison which would be perfect with the vine he brought from Italy last year.

He waits for almost forty minutes in the queue before he decides to make a note to buy the meat for the Christmas dinner next year just a tiny bit earlier than this year.

 

It takes him almost two hours to prepare the meat, the potatoes with rosemary, the vegetables. Q is still in bed but he doesn't mind. It will even be a better surprise when he'll finally tastes what he made him.  
When the meat is put in the oven, James gets upstairs to run his boyfriend a bath. At least he knows that had always been a tradition for him. Taking a bath with candles around it.  
James would love to join him though but he has to take care of the meal.

He calls for Q, who is still lying in bed, when the bath tube is full with good smelling water and the candles are prepared for him as well.  
When he doesn't come immediately, he visits him in their shared bed.

“Bath tube is ready for you.”  
He gently strokes over Q's dark curls. “The water smells like blood orange and cinnamon.” he tells him. “Everything's prepared for you.”  
Q hides his face in the pillows.  
“Get downstairs when you're clean, okay? Dinner will be ready by the time you finished!”

 

James takes his suit with him – carefully not to let Q see it since he wanted to surprise him - and dresses up in their guest room, then he goes back to setting the table and decorating the christmas tree he bought yesterday.

 

The meal smells fantastic and Bond is quite proud of himself. Usually Q was the better cook but this time James would prove that he wasn't that bad either.

Q doesn't come downstairs.  
Bond searches for him in the bath room. The water is cold by now, untouched.

When he finds Q in their bedroom, James knows he's an idiot.  
Q is in a fetal curl, shaking, while silent tears run down his face. He doesn't look up to his boyfriend.  
“Is there anything I can do for you?” James asks calmly but Q shakes his head and sobs quietly.

He can't do anything about it and he knows it. He wants to take Q's hand but he moves away from him when he tries to touch him.  
“Q.” he says softly but the young man only cries harder, whimpering almost inaudible words.  
“I'm so lonely.” he breathes and buries his face in his hands.  
James attempts to embrace him but Q only winces.  
“Don't touch, please don't touch me.”  
James simply nods and reaches for a new package of tissues.  
“I can't...” Q starts shaking, breathing quicker and quicker. “I... I...” he can't form the words.

James stays with him until his boyfriend is able to breathe slowly again.  
“Do you want to eat something?”  
Q shakes his head.  
“Can you leave please. I need some time alone.”

James leaves, sitting down on the set table, meat and potatoes cold. He doesn't feel like eating anyway. He drinks the vine and waits for the night to end.

 

When the sun starts rising, James gets back to Q and lays down next to him. He closes his eyes and reaches for Q's hand, intertwining their fingers and sighing deeply.  
Q's sleep is calm but James still can't find a way to relax enough to fall asleep,too, so he just watches his boyfriend as the first rays of the sun caress his pale skin.

 

Hours later Q wakes up, looking into Bond's eyes and it takes only ten seconds before he's crying again but this time Bond holds him. At least for a while.

 

_to still be alive._

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for not tagging this as depression but I didn't want to spoil things.
> 
> I know how hard things are for the people suffering from depression especially on christmas when you're supposed to be happy.  
> It isn't easy for the ones who love them,too. Sometimes you just can't help, also you don't know what's the matter because sometimes even the persons suffering don't know it themselves.
> 
> Please stay strong, someday it's going to get better. Promise.
> 
>  
> 
> [Also I'm not saying depression means that someone isn't alive.. in this story it just means that James wants Q to /feel/ alive again because like this he's only a shadow of his former self unable to believe he's still breathing, living, because it's just doesn't feel like it.]


End file.
